I’m 0 Weeks and Craving a Baby

Oh Facebook. You’ve done it again.

Ladies, have you seen this new Facebook meme, floating around our little Facebook inboxes?

It’s that time of year again in support of Breast Cancer Awareness! We all remember last years game of writing your bra color as your status? or the way we like to have our handbag handy?

Remember last year so many people took part that it made national news and the constant updating of status reminded everyone why we’re doing this and helped raise awareness!

DO NOT tell any males what the status’ mean, keep them guessing And please Broadcast this to all ur female friends to see if we can make a bigger fuss this year than last year

I did my part… So now its YOUR turn!

The idea is to choose the month You were born and the day you were born. Pass this on to the girls only and lets see how far it reaches around. The last one about the bra went round the world.

So you’ll write… I’m (your birth month) weeks and I’m craving (your birth date) !!! as your status

Example: Feb 14th= I’m 2 weeks and craving Choclolate mints!!

Wait… what?

You want me to fake a pregnancy announcement on Facebook… to raise awareness… about breast cancer?

Baby Facepalm

That makes about as much sense as offering a free vasectomy in honor of National Infertility Awareness Week. (Yeah… remember when that happened?)

I had seen the mass mailing in my Facebook inbox myself but ignored the message as soon as I saw the first sentence. Chain letter emails aren’t exactly my thing. It wasn’t until I saw this post from Rachel Gurevich that I took a second look at what was sitting in my Facebook inbox and was appalled at the 71 replies all blindly replying their various “weeks along” and “cravings.”

In Rachel’s post, she writes about asking her husband how he would feel if she had posted that meme as her own Facebook status. She writes:

I asked my husband what he’d have thought, if I had been crazy enough to participate in this new meme, implying I was expecting and then said “just kidding.” He made clear he would have been very hurt. As would all my family and friends, thinking they should be thrilled for me, when in fact, it was just a “joke.”

After reading her post, I stopped and asked my own husband.

“So that’s it? Just post the status and no link to any kind of breast cancer website?”

“Nope.”

“Yeah… that doesn’t make any sense.”

Larry hit the nail right on its ugly little head.

What could have been a perfectly good opportunity to link to a targeted awareness-raising website, a donation call to action, even just a simple breast cancer FAQ, instead became a confounding pile of shit that stinks of insensitivity and pandering.

And now, your moment of irony.

By using a fake pregnancy status to raise awareness for breast cancer (without any supporting context acknowledging that the status is supposed to in fact, raise awareness for breast cancer), it completely misses the boat that infertility is a very real side effect of any cancer.

/irony

I have written before about how Facebook is a dangerous, unforgiving territory for folks dealing with infertility. This meme, in all its pandering cutesy glory, has only made it an even crueler landscape, as, in the run up to Breast Cancer Awareness Month in October, we’ll have to see lots of silly “I’m 16 weeks and craving beans!” statuses flooding our Facebook feeds.

Which could be particularly awkward if say, you’d just seen the person the day before that status, like what happened to Mel at Stirrup Queens this week.

In replying to the growing comment thread on Rachel’s original post about this, I mused about posting the following:

“I’m 0 weeks and craving a baby. Infertility affects 7.3 million people in the United States alone, affecting as many as 1 in 8 couples. Like me. Learn more about raising awareness for infertility.”

This comment has received several likes and has emboldened me. I’m going to post this as my status. With my higher ed background, I’m all about having an educational moment or two.

So, to make this truly educational, let me clean it up a bit.

“I’m 0 weeks and craving a baby. What does this have to do with breast cancer? Infertility affects 7.3 million people in the US alone – like me – and it’s a very real side effect for cancer patients. If you or someone you love has been touched by cancer or infertility – or both – check out Fertile Hope and make a real difference by contributing today: http://bit.ly/odomMY

Edited to add: Fertile Hope, for the record, is an initiative of the Lance Armstrong Foundation, and its mission is “dedicated to providing reproductive information, support and hope to cancer patients and survivors whose medical treatments present the risk of infertility.” So by linking to them, you’ll help increase awareness about both cancer AND infertility at the same time. Woohoo for double-whammy awareness raising!

So… who’s with me? Who wants to post this as their Facebook status over the next few weeks and days?

Let’s flood our friends’ Facebook feed with actual education and awareness-raising, with a genuine call to action that asserts us as empowered, compassionate individuals rather than another mindless sheep posting pointless statuses in the Facebook meme herd.

If you’re in, let me know in the comments. Share how this status has landed with others once you posted. Have a more clever, empowered, or educational status that you would or have posted about this? Share in the comments!

Let’s reclaim sensitivity, let’s raise awareness for an amazing organization, and let’s inspire actual action instead of just passively hiding it in a pointless, cruel Facebook meme.

Let’s take back Facebook.

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Comments

  1. says

    I’m going to make a minor adjustment to reflect that I am post-infertility battle, but this is definitely going up in my status.

    Once again, I’m amazed at how you can take something that makes infertiles a casualty and turn it around for a powerful weapon for us to use.

    Brava.

    • Keiko says

      Sounds excellent – feel free to tweak away. I think what it comes down to is that in my heart of hearts, I’m a fighter, b/c I’ve always been the little guy my whole life.

      And well, I’m just not gonna stand by and just take this bullshit, now am I? ;)

  2. says

    LOVE IT! This was my status… “I’m 0 weeks and craving a baby. What does this have to do with breast cancer? Infertility affects 7.3 million people in the US alone. Breast Cancer affects nearly 200,000 women & men in the US. For more information on Infertility Awareness visit http://www.resolve.org and for more information on Breast Cancer Awareness visit http://www.komen-dallas.org.”

  3. says

    I am proud to steal your status and use it as my own. Here is what I posted yesterday:

    Fake pregnancy Facebook statuses don’t lead a cure for breast cancer. You know what does? Self exams. Donating to legitimate organizations like the American Cancer Society. Getting a mammogram. Playing a status game on Facebook doesn’t save lives.

    I stole it from another IF friend.
    :) me

  4. says

    I think I am too emotionally spent to do this right now, but I ought to post “I should be 40 weeks and craving something, but instead my baby is dead.” (Because obviously this stupid thing had to come out during my due date week.) This is just the most ridiculous thing ever, besides being incredibly painful for a lot of people.

    • Keiko says

      Oh Jen… I had no idea that this was Luke’s due date week. *hug* From what I’ve been reading on a lot of other ppl’s FB pages and blogs and such, it’s amazing to see how many ppl this whole meme has really hurt.

      Thinking of you.

  5. says

    I’m in, and I will be posting it on and off again through October. It’s such a disgrace, not only to infertiles, but to cancer patients and survivors as well. It’s as if we are minimizing their pain and suffering for a joke.

    • Keiko says

      Abby – brilliantly put. One thing I’ve noticed is that I haven’t seen ANY of my friends that I know who have been affected by cancer (directly or indirectly) use this status at all.

      It just seems to offend everyone, really.

  6. says

    I was horrified at the recent assertion on FB for this post. I posted this under my notes https://www.facebook.com/notes/meghan-hall/games-and-the-truth/10150273761606053 and have encouraged everyone I know that this post is harmful and hurtful. I run an NPO for a birthdefect and deal with the parents of loss, Needless to say when this came about I had several parents devastated at their friend’s apathy to their recent or past losses. I hope there is a way to collectively get a letter together for Susan G and Breast Cancer Societies to put out that they do not support or condone this message. Additionally October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month as well…the irony is not at all humorous.

    • says

      A joint statement from them, along with Fertile Hope, would be amazing and do SO much more for awareness raising for both causes.

  7. says

    I also snagged the one from Elphaba and got more responses than I usually do to ANY status update, and all of them positive. Several of my friends thanked me for standing up, and another snagged it and used it as her own as well!

    I am taking a page from Mel’s book and am rounding up all the posts I can find that deal with this stupid thing and putting them up on my blog. I shall include yours, and anyone else who wants in. If you want me to NOT include you, just let me know!

    • says

      Snag away. Make sure to check out the other posts people have linked here in the comments; you can click on commenters’ names to go to their blogs. Be sure to come back and leave a link here so I can check out your post once it’s up!

  8. says

    I was horrified at the recent assertion on FB for this post. I posted this under my notes https://www.facebook.com/notes/meghan-hall/games-and-the-truth/10150273761606053 and have encouraged everyone I know that this post is harmful and hurtful. I run an NPO for a birthdefect and deal with the parents of loss, Needless to say when this came about I had several parents devastated at their friend’s apathy to their recent or past losses. I hope there is a way to collectively get a letter together for Susan G and Breast Cancer Societies to put out that they do not support or condone this message. Additionally October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month as well…the irony is not at all humorous.

    • Keiko says

      Meghan, thank you for pointing out that October is also Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month. And a joint statement from RESOLVE and the Komen Foundation, along with Fertile Hope, would be incredible!

  9. says

    I have to admit, I got sucked into this meme and am SO regretting it. :( My family knew it wasn’t true but I am still dealing with friends and coworkers who were very excited for me, then followed by confusion and disappointment. I don’t really feel comfortable outing myself as dealing with infertility but I do like these suggestions for status messages.

    • Keiko says

      It’s easy to get sucked into these games – it’s just the way Facebook has evolved really. And I totally understand not wanting to out yourself yet – it’s a highly personal decision. But I appreciate your honesty for sharing that you participated regardless and realize now that this wasn’t just another innocent little FB meme.

      Thanks for commenting!

  10. Stephanie says

    I am new to discovering my infertile status and when the first few comments on FB came out I was unaware of the meaning and found myself thinking you have got to be kidding me. Why is everyone getting pregnant now. Then I discovered that it was a breast cancer game when someone sent it to me and I was thinking wow this is horrible. I may post your comment in my status in the next few days.

    • Keiko says

      Stephanie, I’m so sorry for your recent diagnosis. The timing of this is hitting a lot of folks hard right now; and it’s true, when you’re first diagnosed, all you see are pregnant ladies and pregnancy announcements (ironically enough the same way when you’re worried you MIGHT be pregnant when you don’t want to be), so I can’t imagine how overwhelmingly cruel this must have seemed to you.

      Thank you for commenting and thinking of you as you begin to navigate your journey.

  11. britt says

    i love this post. i haven’t seen any of my friends post “cravings” yet but if i do i may have to steal your awareness post! well written and well said.

  12. says

    I’ve lost relatives to cancer and both my mother and my aunt have battled cancer. It isn’t a joke, and stupid little memes like this do more harm than good. If these silly people really want to bring cancer up, why don’t they just post as their status. “I got my mammogram today. When was the last time you got yours? Self exams and mammograms save lives. Put this as your status if you want to join the fight against breast cancer.” Why post about your damned bra color, where you put your purse, or fake pregnancy cravings? While your at it, get your colonoscopy (my dad, died of colon cancer in 2000) and wear your sunscreen and get your moles checked (my mom, skin cancer, thankfully cancer free for 5 years now.)

    • Keiko says

      I’m so sorry for your losses. If there’s one thing I’ve noticed, it’s definite silence from survivors… because I think they’re kind of second-hand embarrassed for the people posting this who think it’s actually accomplishing anything. It’s not, it’s rude, and it does a disservice to everyone.

      This has definitely emboldened me to think about posting when I do get a regular exam (bone density, mammogram, pap smear, etc.) as a reminder to raise awareness for the appropriate health risks I’m trying to prevent.

  13. says

    PS I do love the idea of a status about infertility to raise infertility awareness. However, it deserves it’s own spotlight, separate than cancer, even if there is a connection.

  14. says

    While I didn’t make this my status, I replied to the people in my feed who posted this meme, pointing out what they were doing. Most of them were extremely apologetic; most of them also removed the thread entirely or posted a retraction and some real information about breast cancer. Which made me happy.

    • Keiko says

      I’m glad people are actually posting real factual information in response, since the original meme was devoid of any educational awareness-raising. I’m glad that the people you’ve educated have realize how awful this whole thing was in the first place, too.

      • says

        This is what my biggest issue was on this. Yes, I have being IF (having IF? what’s the term? I should know!) but even outside of suddenly realizing that 30 people I know are “5 wks and craving apples”, my real problem was that when I asked people how this was activism, they replied, “Well, you are talking about it, right?” No. We are talking about your dumb FB status. My knowledge of breast cancer and its reality is no higher than it was 20 minutes ago.

  15. says

    Keiko, I also wrote about this on my blog thejourneyididntexpect.blogspot.com Having lost an aunt to uterine/ovarian cancer and having a mom who survived cervical cancer due to regular screenings, it always miffs me about that “game” done to raise awareness. I haven’t put anything up as my FB status yet, but you’ve given me some excellent ideas. Please visit and let me know if you think my response was OK or too harsh. Thanks!

    • Keiko says

      Ranae, I’m so sorry for your loss. I think you put it so simply: cancer isn’t a game. I’ll definitely swing by and check out your post – thanks for linking up here!

  16. says

    Awesome. I was devastated when I read this on a “friend’s” status and had no idea she was pregnant let along 12 weeks. After finding out what it was about, I thought, what the heck does this have to do with cancer? So strange the way people’s minds work.

    • Keiko says

      Yeah – this whole this is like Napoleon Dynamite levels of awkward. Mel’s post really gets into the whole “why didn’t my close friend – and the rest of my friends – tell me she was 22 weeks pregnant?” Definitely check it out.

  17. says

    I love how you take lemons and make lemonade :-)

    I think the creators of this meme have mistaken people making a fuss for awareness. They could also raise a lot of awareness by raising a fuss if they could get women to strip down in public areas and dance naked on the table. People would get arrested, people would write about how horrified they were when their co-worker stripped down next to them, people would write about how awesome it was to see so many titties that week, it would hit the newspapers. But just because you have people discussing the action doesn’t mean that you have raised awareness. I’d like people to write what they have learned about breast cancer from this. What breast cancer facts have we all learned that we didn’t know before?

    • Keiko says

      First, I must say: thank you for the inaugural use of the word “titties” on my blog :) It’s only taken 2.5 years for the word to appear. Let the floodgates of crass language fly open! :-D

      (Seriously though, that tickled me like you wouldn’t believe.)

      Also… the sheer level of asshattery in your comment section on your post is almost one I have to stand back and admire. I can’t believe how many people are willing to say it’s OUR problem that we got offended. I seem to remember Carrie Snider at PETA telling me the same thing about getting my panties in a knot over a free vasectomy for NIAW.

      I love the way you end your comment: what breast cancer facts have we learned that we didn’t know before?

      Well, according to this FB meme, I’ve learned that breast cancer exists.

      Wow, that’s some fine awareness-raisin’, Lou.

      What I’ve learned from the outcry is that breast cancer affects men too (I didn’t know that) and that encouraging people to keep this a secret from men (as the meme originally stated) is actually counter-intuitive to comprehensive prevention.

  18. says

    I can’t stand those memes. They’re just as bad as the ones that end in “99% of people are too cowardly to post this…” I think you’re response to it is brilliant. I never understood how typing the color of your bra, or the location of your purse would help raise cancer awareness. I spent six years trying to conceive my son, and if I had posted a fake pregnancy on something like facebook, even one that is supposed to be part of some sort of “in-the-know joke,” my family and friends would have gone through the roof. Facebook has turned a lot of people into mimicking parrots or sheep.

    • elizabeth says

      I hate all those stupid meme’s…last time a friend sent me one (I believe it had to do with posting a type of alcohol depending on the list you were given), I updated my status to “Elizabeth is not a sheeple.” And promptly took 2 weeks off of facebook. Didn’t miss it one bit.

      • Keiko says

        I agree. Memes for the most part, are dumb. I mean, I love my rage comics, and my CSI David Caruso stuff, and pretty much anything you find on Reddit. But this? This was dumb.

  19. says

    I’m so irritated by this meme both due to my and others’ infertility as well as that I have had several friends and family suffering from cancer recently. If only some stupid status update would raise awareness and lead to a cure. Good for you for taking action. I posted a somewhat snarky status update of my own on Friday. Funny, I’ve received no invitations to participate ;-)

    • Keiko says

      Sometimes you have no choice but to lay on the snark when the level of stupid is just so overwhelming. Good for you for having the balls to do it :)

      • Jackie Hardaker says

        I love your comment so much I made it my FB status:

        Recently read this in response to this breast cancer FB status update and thought this phrase applies to many of life’s situations. “Sometimes you have no choice but to lay on the snark when the level of stupid is just so overwhelming

        My family has been affected by child loss, infertility and cancer, hugs to all your forum members.

  20. betty says

    My Boss so far has been my only fb friend to post this latest meme, and I don’t see what it has to do with breast cancer awareness, although I did consider playing along myself, until I read a blog written by someone struggling with infertility….
    My mom is a 20 year survivor, so I would like to post something creative…I can’t do the “0 weeks and craving a baby” because I am currently single…although, when I was married, we tried for 4 years and never got pregnant…I would have posted that when I was still married.

    • Keiko says

      You could always post this: “I’m 0 weeks and craving nothing, because breast cancer isn’t a game on Facebook. Cancer affects real people, like my mom. Consider making a contribution to X” where X is the cancer charity of your choice.

      Good luck & thanks for commenting!

  21. says

    I posted it on my facebook and have a wonderful response. Most folks, if or no if, thought it was just plain stupid and had no connection to breast cancer awareness.

    • Keiko says

      I’m glad you’ve gotten such a positive response! Thanks for posting and spreading the movement to take back Facebook :)

  22. maya says

    I just googled that stupid FB status thing trying to find out where it came from and stumbled upon this conversation… Thank you! As a young breast cancer survivor whose ability to have more children has been trumped by the disease, I found it so irritating. I will post my version of your post!

    • Keiko says

      I’ve always been curious as to the ppl that actually start these kinds of things… who are these mysterious meme writers?

      Maya, congrats on surviving breast cancer. If you’re not familiar with Fertile Hope, do check them out – they’re a phenomenal resource for patients of cancer who are looking for post-treatment fertility support.

  23. Amy says

    This has really hit the nail on the head. my best friend & her husband have suffered from infertility for many years.

  24. Rebecca says

    A FB friend linked to your blog today and I’m so glad she did. I’m the mother of 4 children all through adoption and when I saw the stupid ___ weeks post initially I felt myself sliding back to my days of infertility… I don’t think the post was meant to be harmful but it is a truly idiotic campaign for all the reasons you eloquently stated. Because of your inspiration here is my status update today:

    I’ve seen the “____ weeks and craving____ ” posts going around and I’ve got to admit I don’t see how this leads to a cure for Breast Cancer. I thankfully heard the word “benign” this summer after a mammogram and biopsy for a lump found during a self exam. Ladies if you see that senseless post going around let it be a reminder to examine yourself. And let’s not forget our friends that are “Zero weeks and craving a baby.”

    Thank you for giving words to this!!

    • Keiko says

      Rebecca, thank you for sharing your story and experience. I’m glad you’re okay – I can’t imagine how scary that mammogram must have been for you. An important reminder indeed. Thank you for commenting!

  25. says

    Found your post through Nichole over at Babble and am amazed at how stupid people can be. Ignorant? Maybe. Insensitive? DEFINITELY. I’m sorry that you’ve been exposed to it all, and if I were on FB I’d totally take that status!

    • Keiko says

      Thanks for visiting & commenting, Andrea. Sometimes the level of stupid on Facebook is simply amazing.

  26. Cathy Miner says

    I choose not to post the original as it would have caused too much of a stir in my family as well. But I will not direct people to your site either, even though I agree with the basis of it. If you were truly for higher education, you would have chosen your words more carefully and not tucked four letter offensive words into your monologue.

  27. Erin says

    Thank you so much! I thankfully was finally able to have my baby, but I definitely posted this to my facebook status (with a little tweaking.) I was so upset when this new meme started and I started posting links to donation sites, hoping people would get the message. Thankfully the meme has stopped among my friends, but you never know when the next person will get the message again. All we can do is spread the word.

  28. says

    Somehow the person who sent me the letter was someone who’d gone through three years of infertility and had cried each time someone had announced a pregnancy. She has a four month old baby and failed to understand why I refused to participate, despite telling her one of my friends had a hysterectomy last month and was now sterile, so posting a fake pregnancy would mock her pain deeply. I also lost a friend to breast cancer in March, so this isn’t a game to me.

    Instead of posting a fake pregnancy announcement, I decided to post the last time I did a self exam. So my status was “I did it yesterday!” I figured that way at least people would like, you know, ask themselves “That’s stupid, but when did I do my last exam…?”

    • Keiko says

      Oooh I like the “I did it yesterday!” status. Same idea, better execution.

      Sometimes, for as much as we think our sisters-in-arms might be sensitive, they’re aren’t. Ultimately, we’re all human, yes, and some ppl just want to move on and forget once they’re resolved.

      I’m so sorry for the loss of your friend. Thank you for sharing your experience here.

  29. says

    Absolutely posted this to my status, along with an added link to the National Foundation for Breast Cancer. Thank you for summing it up in words the stupidity of these Facebook games.

  30. says

    Loved this post! I linked to it from facebook…lots of likes already. Sometimes people just don’t even realize how insensitive their “games” are!

  31. Steph S. says

    Oh, VERY good points indeed! I usually just ignore those forwards; the ONLY reason why I participated in it THIS time was because for ONCE it wasn’t “dirty” and making people think about what underwear I wear or what my love life is like. :P BUT, after posting it, I TOTALLY see all the crap it creates!! I’ve had a ton of people think I was serious!! I didn’t stop to think that that is a dumb thing to joke about. Having a baby is AWESOME! However, I feel the need to point out that although someone (i.e. myself) may have had a thoughtless moment, it would take someone completely senseless not to realize that those of us who DID participate, meant absolutely NO harm or offense. Sometimes we all need to step back and look at other people’s perspectives and not just jump to the first conclusion or judge others. I immediately deleted my post after realizing how stupid it was and thinking of others’ perspectives.

    • Keiko says

      Steph, thank you for sharing your experience so honestly. It’s easy to just post this FB crap without thinking. That was my point -to encourage people to actually stop and think about what they were posting and why, and just how it affects so many people so deeply. I’m glad you had your “aha!” moment and that you’ve shared that with us here.

  32. says

    It is amazing how many people (cancer survivors and infertile alike) that have been offended by this game. I also found it annoying and insensitive and made my own note on FB and my blog. Facebook isn’t meant to be sensitive to everyone but I agree with the one poster here that so many people are turning into FB sheep and post without giving things a second thought. Ughhhhh!

    • Keiko says

      Sheep is an excellent way of describing it. Thanks for posting your note on FB and spreading the word!

  33. Jesica says

    I just posted the link to this with a big thank you to all of you women and let everyone know that even though I’ve been blessed with one beautiful child we will never be able to have another of our own and that I am also 0 weeks and craving a baby. Seeing everyone posting about being pregnant has made for a few hard days and it’s nice to see that I haven’t been the only one affected by this.

    • Keiko says

      Jesica, thank you for your bravery of sharing how this meme has personally affected you, and for sharing that on FB too. Wishing you the best on your journey!

  34. Brenda says

    My daughter (who is not on FB) sent me this article through an email.
    Her and her husband, along with my son and his wife, are infertile couples who desperately want children.
    I had no idea what the weeks and the cravings were for, but thought it was some kind of “game” that appears every so often.
    Having had some fertility issues of my own,along with some breast biopsy scares, I think it is very inappropiate to use this as a way to promte BCA.
    To me, it trivializing both issues.
    Overstated? I don’t think so.

    • Keiko says

      Brenda, that’s amazing that this post was emailed to you! Thank you for sharing that experience, and for being such a caring, supportive mother to your daughter and son-in-law. Believe me when I say, it really helps to have a mom who understands and is there to support us in our journey. Thanks for commenting!

  35. says

    I posted the status, even though I’m technically “on a break” from the ALI community. Some things just can’t be ignored. I’ll let you know if I get any interesting responses…

  36. Katy says

    Thank you for pointing this out. I didn’t play last year or this year, but also suffer from infertility even though I have 2 beautiful daughters. I also have lots of friends who suffer from it as well and I will repost this status for sure.

  37. Sarah says

    Thank you for this. As soon as I saw this stupid game going around I posted for my flist to not send me it anymore because its just ignorant and makes NO SENSE!

    • Keiko says

      Thanks for commenting Sarah. I agree… I typically hate getting mass email/FB messages for crap like this. I wouldn’t have even realized this was going on if not for Rachel’s About.com post.

  38. Teresa says

    Like you, I was super confused then irritated when I saw what was happening in the name of breast cancer. Saying you’re pregnant when you aren’t is not a funny game. Thank you for sharing this!

  39. Stacey says

    I don’t participate in these games because I have never liked the message they portray. Cancer is not funny or cute and it bothers me that it’s likely the majority of women who participate in these games are doing it for the fun factor, not for actual awareness of the cause. I really enjoyed your article and I’ve shared this in a couple of places and with women who are really passionate about these topics…Thank you for sharing :)

    • Keiko says

      Stacey, you’ve hit the nail on the head re: “the fun factor.”

      Cancer is most definitely NOT fun. I found it particularly offensive b/c in a lot of ways, it’s really patronizing to women. A good friend of mine is now a 6-month post-cancer survivor, and I can say with confidence, it was no fun ride for her at all.

  40. says

    This was a great post. This particular FB game hasn’t only hurt those dealing with infertility, but those of us who are part of the pregnancy & infant loss group. Some of us have had repeated miscarriages & chemical pregnancies, have lost babies shortly after birth (like myself & after a struggle I brought home my preemie rainbow baby in late August after 46 days in the NICU) & have also had secondary infertility. This “game” is so insensitive & ridiculous. I wish people would go DO something for breast cancer instead. & let’s not forget that October is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Month.

    Your blog is great & I plan on following it in the future. I came here from a link on my Facebook wall. Guess you can find good things on FB every once in a while.

  41. Grandma says

    Actually this game worked for me. The shock factor of seeing my aged 50+ friends claim to be pregnant and got my attention and I scheduled my mamogram which is 2 yrs. over due. I think that’s what the game was meant to do, and while I didn’t play it – it made me aware that I needed to make that appointment. We’ll see on Oct. 3rd how important it was.

  42. Megan says

    THERE’S ANOTHER ONE!!!!! gahhhhhhh :( :( :(

    Okay ladies, it’s that time of year again…support of Breast Cancer Awareness!! So we all remember last year’s game of writing your bra color as your status? Or the way we like to have our handbag handy? Last year, so many people took part that it made national news and the constant updating of status reminded everyone why we’re doing this and helped raise awareness!! Do NOT TELL ANY MALES!!!!!! …what the statuses mean…keep them guessing!! And please copy and paste (in a message) this to all your female friends! It’s time to confuse the men again (not that it’s really that hard to do ;]) The idea is to choose the month you were born and the day you were born. Pass this on to the GIRLS ONLY and lets see how far it reaches around. The last one about the bra went around all over the world. Your status should say: “I am going to________________for___________ months.”

    Once again…absolutely NOTHING to do with breast cancer…or any F’N cancer, for that matter. So, to prove it’s “awareness”, an old friend of my bf’s posted this, prompting him to suddenly exclaim “SO AND SO’S MOVING TO LONDON FOR X MONTHS…I’ve got to call her!”
    Cue 10 minutes later….”oh so she’s not moving…it’s some breast cancer awareness thing”. And that’s the end of it. No follow-up, no “maybe I’ll donate to XYZ Breast Cancer Foundation”, no “let’s really work for more funding!”
    Just….”oh yeah, it’s a breast cancer thing”. Why don’t the creators of these idiotic memes realize this??????

  43. says

    Thanks for sharing the link to Elphaba’s post. I’ll have to hop over and five it a read. I’ll have to check out yours too: it’s important we all write about this.

  44. Keiko says

    Ashley, thanks so much for posting. I love the tweaks, too. I can’t imagine what you must be feeling running up to try for #2, especially after difficulties with #1. Check out RESOLVE.org – they have some great support group resources you might find helpful as you leap into round 2.